Rhetorical Questions
Face-melting Rants Comments (14)
My grandmother taught me not to hate and this has always served me well. Even my grandmother, however, shares my extreme distaste for politics. And God help me, but I do loathe politics and the politicians who perpetuate it. I hate it because it provides the lowest common denominator in a society both overwhelmed and satisfied with mediocrity the opportunity to judge people. I also hate it because it takes advantage of my cynicism and drives me to despair. Finally, I hate politics because it’s reduced me to a state of blogging about my hatred of it in order to relieve the accumulation of bile.
I am not an advocate of either party; I think equally ill of them both. All of them, actually. Even those whack-ass libertarians. I manage to remain somewhat separated from the piles of horseshit spewed by the various networks and their poorly-veiled bias and stand aside as the shucking and jiving of the campaign circus passes. I have zero desire to join in any debate. What I can’t abide, however, is the hypocrisy on the part of our society, at large. The blatant, infuriating, ass-rapingly unsubtle hypocrisy of ‘patriotic’, God-fearing’, ‘forward-thinking’ people. Nothing shines a beacon on this flavor of vice like the opportunity to judge others and there is no better forum for this than the political realm. So, allow me to pose some rhetorical questions to my supposedly puritanical, flag-waving, lapel-pin sporting country-men and –women.
Hello, America. Answer me this: In judging people for public office, why is it you hold them to higher standards than you collectively hold yourself? Not just higher standards, either. Absurdly unattainable standards, based on a carbon-based template crawling with the scourge of human nature. McCain’s too old, you say. Judging from the trends of standardized test scores over the last couple decades, your education system isn’t exactly setting us up for a future filled with unicorns and rainbows, so maybe requesting the governance of folks one or two generations older isn’t as outrageous as it’s being made to seem. And about those standardized tests: Great idea.
Palin’s unfit to govern because her 17-year old daughter had a baby out of wedlock, you say. Oh, fuck you. First of all, I’ll bet you probably think this wouldn’t have been as big a deal if she’d been 18. Really? Is that because something profound happens during that one-year transition from innocent little flower to responsible adult? You know what 18 is? It’s a number. Period. It’s arbitrary. An 18-year old is a 17-year old you can legally slap a uniform on and send somewhere to dodge bullets (alcohol-free, of course). Second, are you implying that the two people involved in the baby making didn’t realize the consequences of their actions because their parents didn’t make it clear enough? Nice assumption. Do we need to have a talk about brain chemistry and teenagers and how sometimes young people do things contrary to their parents instructions? *GASP* If you want to hate Sarah Palin, hate her because she’s an idiot who even to this day advocates abstinence-only education as a birth control technique along with a militantly pro-life agenda without consideration of individual circumstances, but don’t hate her because her 17-year old daughter and her equally hormonally-wracked boyfriend succumbed to an urge that people twice their age have a hard time controlling. And unfit to govern whom? YOU?!?!? When was the last time you looked at your demographics?!? A mother of someone involved in an unplanned pregnancy would be EXACTLY who’s qualified to govern a country full of single parents, unwanted children, skyrocketing divorce yates, and a child welfare system clogged with custody battles and allegations of abuse.
Keeping with the theme of Palin-related schadenfreude, you brought up the fact that she was caught fishing without a license and that her husband was a member of the Alaskan Independence Party. News Flash: You can’t swing a dead cat in Alaska without hitting someone mildly interested in seceding from the union. I lived there for four years. I proverbially swung that dead cat and even thought to myself at times, ‘Huh, y’know……’, because after you’ve lived in a place like Alaska long enough, you begin to question the point of ever returning to the lower 48, much less paying them taxes. Also, correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t her husband’s right to assemble with whoever the hell he wants protected by that strange little document that seems to get pulled out only when it’s convenient? And, sure, let’s talk about what you seem to perceive as an overt act of disregard for the law. As for the law itself, how’s your criminal justice system looking? Focused on rehabilitation, right? Fair and unbiased? According to the line-up of hour-long voyeurism served up nightly and weekends by MSNBC, your society views other people’s incarceration as entertainment, evidently secure in the notion that it could never happen to them, despite increasing evidence to the contrary. Convicts have long been told that they need to pay a debt to society; I’d argue that such an activity requires a society worthy of being paid such a debt. Maybe you should look into that instead of one woman’s transgression involving a salmon.
Finally, let’s discuss the importance of experience. Palin has none. Obama has little. Biden and McCain have more. There are, however, two well-known politicians that dwarf them all in the realm of foreign and domestic policy, racking up ~80 years of experience between them. Dick Cheney’s and Donald Rumsfeld’s vast experience didn’t save them from giving in to hubris via the corrupting influence of power. There’s more to foreign and domestic diplomacy than experience. So, how about we drop the ‘experience’ bullshit?
You have no moral high ground on which to stand. I realize other countries are saying this based on Iraq, but I’m saying this based on things happening here. Your society implying that this or that individual is unsuited to lead them is absolutely ridiculous. Your electorate demands leaders who have been thoroughly unsoiled by the country in which they’ve lived, then they act appalled when even the slightest indiscretion arises. Grab a mirror and take a very hard look, America, and understand how absurd it is to demand that these people be better than what you see.
Sir @ September 4, 2008
Oh, you.
So right, and said so much more eloquently than myself.
you are absolutely right. any person who holds his/her representative to a higher moral standard has no standing to complain when his/her own morality comes crashing down. this is exactly why i cannot support a party that wants to legislate morality. no legislation of reproductive rights, no legislation of marriage rights, no legislation of religious rights, no legislation of anything that has to do with culture. mccain/palin support overturning of roe v. wade, abstinence only education, constitutional amendments banning gay marriage. And they both represent people who are against these sorts of things yet represent families where these sorts of things exist. fuck them.
palin wants to outlaw abortion even in cases of rape/incest. she is against contraceptives in sex education. she thinks creationism deserves a place alongside evolution in science education. i mean come on, what the fuck! i’m supposed to give her a pass on these things because the media is being mean?
this isn’t schadenfreude as far as i’m concerned. it’s karma. no way someone like that gets a pass as far as i’m concerned. clinton went through impeachment because of lewinsky? everything with palin is fair game.
please still be my friend!
i love you and i want to marry this post. i totally agree.
and Brandon, creationism in science class isn’t going to happen anytime soon. abortion, although a stupid cornerstone issue for the GOP, isn’t going anywhere anytime soon. same with immigration; no sweeping “comprehensive” policies will be passed with the deadlock we have now (and which we’ll have then). i think it’s shortsighted to bicker about things that won’t be modified anytime in the next few years (gay marriage, which ought to be a state issue and not a federal one, anyway) — it is more germane to discuss shit that’s GOT to change NOW. like alternate fuel studies. like the economy. like the war.
and it’s just all so hypocritical, if you ask me. things the left praise in themselves they skewer the right for, and visa versa. i’d totally be a libertarian if it wasn’t for the fact that they are all batshit crazy, and support NAMBLA.
your grandmother done good. real good.
high fives all around!
I am not an advocate of either party; I think equally ill of them both. All of them, actually.
Hear, hear, Sir. To all of it, really.
D-d-d-d-d-dude.
..an outsiders opinion
the current fav pastime this side of the planet is “America-bashing”. I say current, but I mean all-time… I must admit it is awfully easy and tempting to point fingers at the strong. but in the end that’s probably good because, to me, strength implicitly means that small mistakes translate into big consequences and hence the need for higher standards. should the quality/morality of governance be measured relative to that of the people it governs?
that was just a general ques. that’s probably not what you are trying to say here.. and yes some of the “arguments” brought forth are utterly ridiculous and a source of brilliant evening humour in pubs here! :-D
it is always reassuring to read that common sense still holds sway in the mighty US of A .. I just hope that it remains “common” and doesn’t turn into a minority opinion. for America’s sake and the rest of us.
I hate Palin for a host of reasons, many of which commenter Brandon touched on a few comments ago. BUT, I also despise her because she wears fur, thinks polar bears aren’t endangered, and supports the aerial hunting of wolves JUST to increase the numbers of moose and caribou for trophy hunters. What a fucking soulless bitch!
Excellent point, and amazingly well said.
By our own standards, NO ONE is fit to govern…
Abigail: You sell yourself short. I’m sure you could do a bang-up job of scolding the country if you gave yourself the chance.
Brandon: I get the impression that you think that I disagree with you. That would be wrong; I agree in every detail. I’m not defending Palin, I’m simply using the issues related to her to make a larger point. She = Awful. I like McCain, always have, and probably always will, but his decision on a running mate is revolting and it makes me wonder if there weren’t a great deal more involved behind the scenes that led to his making the choice.
Crys: I think that if people would back away from the painting and look at the big picture, they’d see that the two parties, at their most basic levels, have more in common than not. What comes across during media coverage is generally the more radical fringe elements whose focus on issues aimed at exciting emotions rather than anything resembling rational thought.
j: Yeah, grandma’s an OK teacher and junk.
Jamelah: Tito’s fake stutter is not welcome here. Only authentic stutters are allowed.
manu: My most recent trip back to England to see friends (this past May) led to many a discussion on the state of both countries. There seems to be as much disillusionment with England’s current parliamentary situation as there is over here in our version. I still listen to Classic FM pretty faithfully via this new internet technology and hear the same sort of tired lines of political woe during their nightly news. I talk frequently about wanting to move back to the UK and chances are I will after graduate school (the thought of doing a postdoc in Edinburgh makes me wet myself with glee), but the truth is our countries are twins (problems, solutions, good, bad) separated by a common language and little else.
Mindy: I seemed to remember something about her suing the administration to actually remove polar bears from the list, which seems pointless in the same way that arguing for the existence of God with a fundamentalist Christian would be. I think we’ve established that she’s the devil.
JenBun: I can’t understand why anyone would even want to anymore.
I agree with Crys… the presidential election ought to be staged — and yes, it is little more than a staged production in my estimation — on over-riding issues of a federal nature that are impending. I mean, ferchrissakes, it’s not like there’s a shortage of issues meeting those criteria. Why do we need to campaign and in many cases cast our votes on whether or not people should use birth control?
How about the effing WAR??? How about the federal deficit??? How about the effing ENVIRONMENT and our dependence on fossil fuels?? Can we PLEASE discuss these in a meaningful way instead of glossing over them in order to get to juicier topics like somebody having sex or getting pregnant? GAH!!!
The news media freakshow is to politics as the internet is to porn. Both have sucked each other into black holes of their own making. Sigh.
But that being said, and excuse me for screaming — it’s what I do as my face melts off in this rant:
Why does it matter?
THE SUPREME COURT, YOU STUPID FUCKS!!!
The string of Republicans in office beginning with Reagan and extending to now have completely decimated the one check/balance that actually matters.
And the system is done broke. A Democrat in office will just result in more-palatable-to-me litmus-tested appointments.
I’d keep writing, but I think I need to go vomit and then beat my head against the wall until the pain stops.
Edinburgh, eh? Let’s go. I hear they serve Scotch there.
Shari: Yes, well, what sells advertising? It certainly isn’t the more concrete issues affecting the world. It’s necessary to aim lower and lower is where the majority aim.
‘mouse Ah, ‘mouse. You and I are cut from the same cloth where drinking is concerned. Also, where the supreme court is involved. The concept of justice seems to be more of a shoulder shrug these days than a hard and fast rule; political clout defines justice anymore, not the other way around. This isn’t new in history, though. I’ve read about the fall of Rome, and I think there are worse ways to watch it happen in this day and age than sitting in Scotland with a well-aged cocktail.
You rant well, Sir.