Devil
IndieInk, The Deep, Whatnot Comments (18)
This week’s IndieInk Writing Challenge was submitted to me by this talented and eclectic dude. The challenge: ‘Think of the last time you were angry with someone and made it clear to them how you felt. Tell the story of the dispute, except tell it from the other person’s point of view.’ A challenge, indeed. The answer to my challenge, issued in the form of a gauntlet thrown melodramatically onto the ground in front of her, can be found here.
It’s as if he’s forgotten that optimism and realism are mutually exclusive. He wants me to believe that things will be fine for him, that finishing this degree will result in something more than a few additional initials after his name. I know better and I know that he does, as well. The world is a dark place. People have agendas. They’ll believe whatever is easiest. Those are both his words and mine. I find this sudden Pollyanna-colored streak in him appalling. Dangerous, even.
These disputes between us have become commonplace over the years, there’s no denying that. The one thing that he can’t dispute is my consistency. I’m no hypocrite. How can he possibly believe that my motives are anything other than pure and involve his best interests? I want what’s best for him, but I know the limitations life inflicts. There’s danger in foreshadowing too much good that might come from any given situation. There is no primrose path. Hasn’t he learned anything?
Quit? I’m not saying he should give up; that’s not an option and I know better than to offer it as such. (Besides…where would he go and what would he do?) Suddenly, however, the possibility of failure doesn’t even register. And it needs to. Always. Doesn’t he remember? It was always failure that drove him forward and now it’s not even worth considering? When he finishes, he’ll be over a decade older than most others in his position. Does he really believe that it won’t matter? Talent and smarts are not the deciding factor in this society. He threw away relative comfort and a guaranteed pension for what? Fulfilment? He’s entering a world where he’s required to rely on others to see in him what he sees in himself. That will be his downfall and I’m unwilling to just sit back and watch it happen.
Always have an exit plan, I tell him, because when the life he’s rebuilt begins to burn, he will be his only savior. He knows that I’m right. Deep down, the narrative is written and he reads it to himself everyday. He has to know that I want what’s best for him, that this is tough love. He has to realize that I’ll never lie to him, even when he insists upon lying to himself.
Sir @ March 2, 2011
Love it. Gorgeous. A Challenge well and truly answered, sire.
And whatever it is you’re chasing? Do it. Fucking do it. I made the safe decision for a steady check 20 years ago and have regretted it every day since.
Do it.
Dude! Tell your id to take it easy on your ego.
I’m with Michael on this…go for it, whatever it is. Life is too short.
Also, this is a wonderful response to a really difficult challenge! What a unique exercise, to be able to look at something that is so close to you from the other person’s point of view.
When I saw that challenge, I knew it would take something special to make it work, but I didn’t know what it was. This was exactly it. Kudos for rocking that prompt.
You bring new meaning to “playing devil’s advocate.” Well done!
That was stellar; you took on the other voice perfectly and I am so totally on your side here. Great results from a tough challenge!
[Also, listen to Michael.]
Wow. This was really well done, thanks for rocking this challenge
wow, powerful. i hope you are making a choice for you.
Thanks for all of the kind words. As for doing ‘it’, ‘it’ is in the process of being done and will likely be finished in a couple of years, after which people will call me ‘doctor’ and will ask random questions about whether something looks infected. ‘Not that kind of doctor’, I’ll say, ‘And, no, it looks ingrown.’ What happens after doctor-hood is attained is the cause of my devil’s bombardment of pessimism. I’m enjoying the ride and have been enjoying it for ~5 years now, devil be damned.
Bob, do you remember the fight scenes in the old Star Trek TV series? The ones where Kirk would be fighting some random alien (or Spock) and that iconic soundtrack would fire up? That’s the music I hear in my head all the time as my id and ego fight it out.
What a wonderful challenge… in life. To be able to put ourselves in the shoes of our counterpart engenders a rare breed of empathy and compassion. It helps us understand our problems from a different perspective and gives resolution a whole new meaning. This was a lovely piece!
Was it hard to write this one?
I am not sure I am person enough to put myself in my the other person’s shoes.
You did it so so so well.
And I’m glad you are in the process of “doing it.”
Wonderful response to a thought-provoking prompt.
[...] challenges Jen O.: Surrender I challenge Anastasia McDonnell: oranges Michael Webb challenges Sir: Devil Miss Ash challenges Michael Webb: Circles Runaway Sentence challenges Zee: Speed of Life Anastasia [...]
I love that this could so easily be two distinctly different people arguing as much as it could be (and seemingly is) two sides of yourself arguing. Very well done, sir.
If I were a man with homo tendencies, I’d take you to the Golden Corral.
[...] challenges Jen O.: Surrender I challenge Anastasia McDonnell: oranges Michael Webb challenges Sir: Devil Miss Ash challenges Michael Webb: Circles Runaway Sentence challenges Zee: Speed of Life Anastasia [...]
I enjoyed this… it was tough to respond to I’m sure. But you carried it well…
I love your approach to this. It’s deeply inward and deeply tied into self discovery and that whole idea of ‘what is my path’. great writing
You, Sir, are a far braver man than I.